Hold on to your seatbelts everyone. It’s another day, which means its time to get the low down on more news in entertainment. Here’s your dose of daily drama. Go nuts.

Mayumi and Richard Heene, the couple who reported their son was aboard a runway balloon, pleaded guilty Friday to “falsely influencing the sheriff.” Since this is the most recent story of people claiming their child was in a runaway balloon, the law found “falsely influencing the sheriff” to be the most appropriate, since he was the guy that had to chase after a balloon for fifty miles.

The ploy was meant to generate publicity for a reality television show. The two amateur storm chasers turned aspiring reality television stars were in the making of budding careers. They already had several appearances of Wife Swap under their belts, and were only two vouchers away from getting their SAG cards. Now, they’re in court for falsely influencing the Sheriff (cue the E! Hollywood True Story intro. music).

The reported deal they had lined up with a reality production company appears to be all but done.

“I don’t think anyone is going to want to meet with a man who shamed his family and children that way,” said Irad Eyal, vice president of development at True Entertainment. “In reality TV, there’s a definite line you don’t cross, and that’s tormenting children.”

Breaking news: Reality Television representatives are now raising their standards above ridiculing children.

One small step for man…

If we take anything away from this story, it’s the disconcerting trend that’s developing where dysfunctional reality television couples are making things inconvenient for everyone else–that’s what real celebrities are for.

Sticking with the Reality T.V. theme and all around burdens on our lives, Jon Gosselin argued in his TLC lawsuit that he was too famous to get a real job.

“I find myself unemployed and without the ability to secure non-entertainment related engagements because the enormous Media interest, cameras, reporters and public interest makes it impossible to carry on normal daily activities, let alone find, secure and maintain a job with an employer who is willing to be exposed to the daily Media intrusions that has impeded by life.”

Credit: James Devaney/WireImage.com

Can’t you just see the team of crack lawyers pulling two all nighters drafting that one up?

If it makes Jon feel any better, I have no idea who the hell he is. If I saw the guy, in the picture to the right, walking down the street, I’d just make fun of his scarf and probably just call him a tool. What I wouldn’t do is get out four camera’s and text my BFF. So, Jon, consider me one less person getting in the way of you finding a job.

This does leave us with a serious situation here, however: We have a man of no skill set, no desire, ambition, or motivation for a job, finding himself unemployed. Just when you think the recession has hit rock bottom…still another, breathing American that can’t find a job.

I’ve got my money saved in gold…do you?

And, mercifully, today’s final story continues with updates on the Carrie Prejean sex-tape. It’s now become a battle of which company gets to distribute the tapes, since there are reportedly seven in all (one for each holiday, I presume…”Sweetest Day” makes seven).

It’s now in the hands of the Pornographic film industry, who have made a living out of cornering people into signing on the bottom line, using their sex tapes as ransom. I have the utmost confidence they’ll be able to get it done. Still, rumors persist she’s defiant to sign off on any approval of a release.

Maybe they should try asking the ex-boyfriend for help?

Let it be told…you’re Daily Drama for November 14, 2009.